HOLIDAY BLESSING

Take the time during your holiday to reflect on Blessing.  One of the most sacred experiences we have as humans is the experience of connection.  We often overlook this and focus our attention on the "stuff" of life. When we feel connected we experience greater Peace, Joy and Happiness.  The acquisition of stuff has only transient value and in fact often heightens our sense of frustration or restlessness. The mind cannot experience Peace through stuff it only wants more stuff which is endlessly stressful.

Try this exercise this Holiday season.  When you give or receive a gift think of it as a Blessing.  think of the gift as a symbol of the connection you feel with the giver or the recipient. We are actually giving and receiving ourselves at the deepest level. Notice the increased fullness and Joy you experience when you focus on Blessing and Connection. Connection is the true Gift that life offers.  Don't miss the gift or overlook the Blessing by getting too caught up in the hype and material focus that surrounds us.

May your Holiday and all of your days be a Blessing, full of Peace, Joy and Connection. Call us @ Professional Alternatives, PLC 540-825-2788 if you are have difficulty with connection in your life or visit us on the web @ professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com

GRATITUDE

Today I want to offer some thoughts about how we change negative thought patterns in our life.  The problem most people have is their thought pattern becomes habitual.  We look for and find what we expect.  So, if you expect life to be difficult or problem filled you find exactly whay you are looking for.  On the other hand if you are expecting life to be positive you will see the opportunity rather than the problem.

For  one month make a committment to keep a gratitude journal.   Every day write down five things you are grateful for in your life.  Spend a few minutes reflecting on these aspects of life and try to get in touch with feelings associated with gratitude.  Several times throughout the day recall your focus of gratitude for the day.  Follow this practice for a month and notice whether your habits begin to change your experience.

If you are having difficulty establishing a pattern of positive experience in your life contact us @ professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com or call us @540-825-2788.

Gratitude

We often notice the things in life that upset us or we point out those things we disagree with. What would happen in your relationship if you concentrated on gratitude instead of complaints? Gratitude reminds us of the reasons we are in a relationship. It brings us back to our heart. When we view our partners with gratitude we approach them with love and kindness rather than criticism.

Viewing our world through the eyes of gratitude immerses us in the present moment without an argument. Complaints inherently separate us from the present and create "an argument with reality".  For 1 month try keeping a gratitude journal on a daily basis and notice changes in your outlook and behavior. If you genuinely try to connect with those aspects of life and your relationship for which you are grateful you will likely notice you experience more joy, increased appreciation for everyday experience and a greater sense of intimacy in your relationship.

Remember that your relationship began in a state of gratitude. We quickly move away from the source of happiness into the egoic struggles for control. Move back into gratitude and practice maintaining it to rekindle the happiness you felt at the start of your relationship.

If you are having difficulty with connecting to gratitude we can help. Contact us @ Professional Alternatives, PLC  540-825-2788 or visit our website http://www.professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com for more information.

Make Your Relationship a Top priority

If asked, most of us would say it is important to remember birthdays an anniversaries. What is less emphasized is the importance of making our relationships a priority every day. Remember when your relationship was new, it was constantly on your mind. You spent time and energy letting your partner know much they meant to you. As relationships become routines we often fall into complacency and making the assumption that our beloved will always be there. When this happens we forget that a relationship can only thrive when we continue to invest in it.

For a month try to make an investment in your relationship every day. Acknowledge the small but important things your loved one does. Make a special effort to spend some time every day sharing your life with each other. Say "I Love You" often. Take time to do something special together each week. Plan a getaway for an evening or a weekend. Write a love-letter, share a favorite song, look at the sunset together.  Engage regularly in bringing beauty and creativity into your life together. At the end of the month talk about your experience and think about what has changed in your relationship.

When we invest in making our relationship a priority we strengthen and support the bond that brought us together.  When we live in a static or habitual pattern our relationship suffers and the bond weakens between us. Live each day as if it is the last day and each day will be filled with joy and a sweet recognition of the importance of your beloved. If your marriage has become stagnant or you are experiencing difficulty give us a call @Professional Alternatives, PLC 540-825-2788 or visit us on the web @ http://www.professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com we can help.

Beauty

We live in a world of thought, constantly judging, categorizing, and evaluating.  What would happen if you stepped out of the mind stream of your thoughts and moved more directly into your experience?  When you stop to consider what your thoughts are based on you would see they are predominantly comparisons based on the past experiences of your life or they are projections of an imaginary future. If we are living in the past and future in our minds what is happening in the present moment?  We rarely know the direct experience of now without a story attached to it.

The present moment is completely unique!  If we could free ourselves from the constant comparisons and judgement we engage in we would open ourselves to experience the creative and truly magnificent  dance of life.  In fact, when you see something that is inspiringly beautiful, one of those "takes your breath away" moments, you are experiencing a momentary lapse in thought.  You have stepped into experience in a direct way. We usually associate those moments with desirable experiences and almost immediately cling to them and try to find ways of repeating the experience.  This experience of beauty is creative, it surprises us into accepting the moment as a gift of experience rather than repeating our thought judgement and categorization process that traps us in habitual thinking.  Beauty invites us into its embrace and nourishes us through its connections to creation. Beauty awakens our senses and fills us with an awareness of something greater than ourselves. Beauty connects us with true happiness.  Step into beauty every day!  Nature is one of the most immediate and powerful displays of beauty, it is everywhere and it is free!  Let nature remind you of your own beauty and celebrate life. If you have lost your connection to beauty or are finding it difficult to escape your mental prison give us a call @  Professional Alternatives, PLC (540)825-2788 or visit us on the web @ http://www.professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com.

Abundance or Scarcity, What is Your world view?

Our experiences in life are governed by our belief system which is usually unconscious and unexamined.  We accept certain things as true without considering whether we have any basis for the beliefs or perceptions we hold.  Do you view your experience through fear and anxiety or with hope and optimism?  Do you see possibilities or obstacles ahead of you? Is your relationship with money one of generosity or hoarding? Is there never enough in your life or do you feel gratitude for what you have?
These questions reflect fundamental differences in the way we approach life and create meaning.  If our view is based in scarcity we will feel fearful and anxious even when the circumstances do not threaten us.  If we approach life with a view of abundance we will find opportunity even when life presents obstacles. These differences dictate the emotional triggers which control our inner word.  We feel happy or stressed based not so much on the outside events but more as a result of our inner belief system.

These issues are some of the important areas we examine in therapy.  Helping people to achieve and maintain a happier life experience requires that we learn to change beliefs that keep us stuck in fear and anxiety. If you are looking for help with your outlook give us a call @ Professional Alternatives, PLC (540) 825-2788 or visit us on the web @ http://www.professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com

Keep It Simple, Breathe!

Amidst the mountains of self help books it  is easy to become overwhelmed with finding a place to start developing a greater sense of who we are.  Clients will often ask if there is a simple way to calm stressful thoughts and my answer is yes, breathe. As simple as that sounds it is very likely that you cannot remember the last time you actually connected with your breath and consciously followed it. When you pay attention to your breath in a conscious or "mindful" way you step into the present moment, connect with your body and begin to notice the subtle but powerful experience of stepping out of thinking.  We spend most of our lives following the endless flow of thoughts into the past and future where most of stress is created.  The simple act of mindfully breathing can connect us to the direct experience of the moment where we can find relief from the mental anxieties and worries. Try it, sit comfortably and turn your attention inward toward your inhalation and exhalation. Pay careful attention to the flow of air and the sensations associated with breathing.  Do not force it let your body do what it knows, just allow the breath to come.  Now try to deepen the breath, by slowing down and taking the breath fully into your lungs then releasing the breath fully.   Try this 10 times.  You will find that this promotes relaxation and a feeling of greater control. Regular practice of mindful breathing will help you feel grounded, less stressed and healthier. If you would like to explore the benefits of mindfulness and breath work further give us a call at Professional Alternatives, PLC or visit us on the web @  http://www.professionalcounselingpiedmontva.com